Frazzle.d's Blog

Goodbye Sheena

http://forums.wow-europe.com/thread.html?topicId=2342174296&sid=1

I don't really need to say much more. I think she's starting at uni at some point, and I can only apologise again for fucking up if you ever read this and wishing you the best of luck in life. This is where I met Sam. This is where I got to know Sam. This is where I got the PM from her inviting me to come play with her and her friends, and I wanted as many people as I possibly could get to wish her the best, since it's doubtful she'll post very often if at all. I wanted to keep her as a friend but recently I screwed up, and I won't go into all the details but it's not been nice for any involved and there's no words for how sorry I am to all of them and.. just.. fucked. I regret ever coming into your life, and I've lost a great friend because I was so stupid.

I think we'll all miss you.

Love ya all

Just don't say it enough

Hope you all had a great new year and have a great 08!

There and back again..

The title for this blog was an easy thing to come up with, I had wanted to write and talk about my experiences and generally share with everyone of my time in Sweden as soon as I sat on the plane coming back but since then a combination of circumstances and something at the back of my mind made it difficult and I've barely spoken to anyone about it. The things I have wanted to speak about have changed and grew a lot but the title remained the same in my mind; a chapter in my life that has came to an end full of it's own story with tragic and happy moments yet looking to a future while all the time being a terrible joke about going to another country and then coming back.

Some of you don't know one way or the other but I had something with Sheena and I went to Sweden to meet up with her and stay there for a while with her and her family. This is the same Sheena who I made a topic about dressing up as a Zero-Suit Samus two years ago, and before that I never would have assumed or bothered if she was a girl (starting on C3 she was called Severin and even then we clicked) and somehow during that time things changed from being friends over the internet to having a relationship where we communicated and interacted mainly through WoW to the point where it was exclusively our world and logging in became more to see her online than it was to level up or any of the other things you do in games.

After a long delay we eventually managed to make plans with her to come over during late October, three days before my birthday, although we had started near the start of summer and had hoped for August and at times it seemed dubious if I was ever going to make it this year at all. This was my first time abroad and the entire time I was nervous and bewildered to be even doing something like this, and after almost missing a transfer in Amsterdam (really pretty city even if I only got to look at it from the air) I arrived in the relatively quiet airport of Arlanda, which everyone confused with Orlando due to the accent while I was getting the tickets. After some waiting while wondering why I had the biggest suitcase out of every other passenger or anyone else that I had seen I noticed two young women pass through the doors and.. walk by me. I didn't realise it was her and her friend at first and after a few minutes went after them 90% sure it Sam - going by the way she walked and dressed - and her friend. It was them and she almost pounced at me for a hug and I almost fell over, because she is even cuter personality wise in person and great looking as the pictures tell, even more so since she is very no frills - no make up, very individualised style. We made our way eventually to the car park drawing dirty looks for having a very large and noisy suitcase and being so jittery and tired I almost followed them into the girl's toilets. Our ride has paw-prints painted on and the longest part of the journey I had expected was the drive - about 4 hours including stops but we had a pleasant and pretty quiet drive (with swedish christmas songs for a while.. At least no Cheeky Girls Barbie Girl cover though :lol and I slept for a good deal of it or was too tired and shy to talk much. We also kissed for the first time at one of the stops, a moment that was over 6 months in waiting for and when I had arrived it was near sunset and had grown dark by that time and in Sweden the weather is sharper, the skies are clearer and the whole place generally feels a lot cleaner than Britain, or at least some of the cities and larger towns and in short it was perfect.

We got back to her place, a really small flat but for what it's worth I think it's well-kept and organised, pretty late around 10pm or something. Showing me around the little space she has for a home she does well with her posters and figures and little neat stuff that make a home feel like home and the little things different from back home, such as the shower and the keyboard with the Swedish symbols that got in the way constantly. Her cat Zelda is also great and was really friendly, and incidentially looked almost exactly like my cat which sadly passed away due to old age while I was in Sweden on the 5th November. RIP Zara.

We spent the next couple of days there, getting along and understanding each others accents better than I hoped and she showed me some of the small town she lives at, and it started becoming more apparent of how lonely it must be and how tricky the economy is as well, reminding me a lot of my hometown; you can live there and call it home, but you feel as though you're missing out somehow since it's so closed off. I also met her sister, aunt, little cousin and their dogs as well which was a little nerve-wracking, I 'met' her cousin on WoW as well and it was just as strange meeting Sam and her sister who I had seen one picture of playing Guitar Hero enthusiastically and she more shy than I was. Plus it was pretty tight in her house: any more than 3 people and we're talking a crowd here, not to mention the damned lampshade she has on her main room light which I kept walking into, adding it to list of nemesis I have.. or rather readding since I'd already tangled with the same lampshades before in my life while I lived in Scotland . I think there's a link between females and the purchasing of lampshades that are a hinderance to the male populace who are tall and have no sense of balance.

We got picked up by her older cousin to stay with her family for the weekend. It's a large house and her aunt's family and Sam's mum live in it in two seperate 'appartments'. It's a little hard to explain, I'd never seen anything like it before. Basically just one biiig house for two families, but her mum stays on her own on the top floor. It was a fairly short drive but the roads in that part of Sweden at least are all quite narrow and not lit that well since a good deal of it all is countryside (plus it's reversed traffic like the French roads are) so the drives I did go on felt a little more winded but nicer to look around at - it's another country and new places inside valleys. Plus there's loads of little lakes and sometimes huge rivers, much larger than anything Britain can offer.

Her family and while I'm at it, everyone I met in Sweden was extremely nice and welcoming and while the levels of how much english they spoke or could understand (it is mandatory at schools and Swedish television is a mix of both english and swedish audio and subtitles) they all made me feel more than at home since it's so rare to see anyone greet a stranger in the street through politeness here in this country and it was so more chilled out than what Blackpool is, both Sam's town and the larger town her family lives at - and her friends and family aren't animals or anything, but definitely capable of making some noise but I've hardly ever met such a large group people that are so easy going, honest, hard working and very pleasant and it's been years since I have. They naturally don't see it that way I guess, but from my perspective going to another country and seeing the difference it's really startling and opens your eyes to what's wrong here and why you dislike it.

That weekend was without doubt the most pleasant birthday I've had in years, although I don't openly celebrate my own birthday due to my up bringing they did know about it and although there was no party, just that night of looking at Sam's artwork, listening to music and chatting to people was just great since I've spent my last few working and had nothing memorable from them, even on my 18th for example. I don't celebrate them for whatever reason or ask anything for it.. but honestly, working 8 hour shifts on them? It bites. Listening to Zitoid (the ET in search of the perfect coffee!) Sam showed me her sketchbooks (one with a giant teddy on the front that was meant for kids but just gave it character especially with the punk look she drew all over it :lol and different 'doodles' - I say artwork because that's what it clearly is. I'd already saw some of her stuff on deviantart and some of it she considers her not-so-great work, and looking at her various work was just beautiful, from the anim

Sheena's back

Yup she's got internet access again. Please spam welcome back etc! I got outdone by a PALADIN last night and need to redeem myself! Cheers.

pee vee pee

The World of Warcraft log-in servers are down while they're chucking together the new patch which I'm really looking foward to; a lot of positive stuff for Hunters, the class I play as my main avatar, and their pets, which is great since typically they get a lot of stick and bad rep for causing deaths in a group, screwing up crowd control measures and being the newbie choice for younger players. Some of this has some basis in fact but I'm looking forward to shunting that misconception once and for all with my pet turtle, Koopa! (And pet wolf, Inka).

I'm also playing through Twilight Princess, I still haven't completed it and the water temple makes me weep inside. I have gamefaq's page bookmarked just in case.

If any of you are interested in webcomics, Machall has relaunched with a new stylish look called three panel soul, you should definitely have a look. There's also www.lfgcomic.com which is based on the WoW universe but even if you don't play the game it's still a nicely drawn and entertaining comic to look through, and the creators are massive bookworms, so look out for subtle references to literature and poetry from time to time, since it'll go over most people's heads.

I also spoke to Sheena on the phone this evening, she won't have internet access for a while so her friend passed her number on while I was playing WoW earlier. Cute voice; she even does the Hrrm thing she normally types out on the forums while talking The call will probably be 3 figures but it was worth it. Sheena rocks! 1 2 3 Next