next time, you see me, i will have a wii.
going to work, coming home, camping out....
.....posting pics by sunday morning.
wish me luck.
alright, i'm back.
Get ready for 7 loooong blogs coming to you in the near future. Very tired. Going to get some sleep before tonight when i'm pumped up tp post in the forums.
Hope everybody's doing alright.
in NJ since last thursday.
Will post regurarly on my return sunday.
my friend posted a pic of tubgirl on my mysapce and i was there to witness it.
That was....no, has got to be...the most disgusting thing i have ever seen.
Welcome one and all to the blog i promised you.
Well, to start things off, i'll say as to how i've been these current weeks. My b-day just passed, got a lot of money, bought an mp3, more preferably the on tAG recommended. Been alright with my folks (pop, mum, sis) and my 4 animals (cockatoo, betta fish, hamster, and hermit crab). Life in florida is getting hotter by the minute but i'm still resorting to wearing long-sleeve shirts (i am VERY skinny, so i like to hide my arms and legs, hence me ALWAYS wearing jeans and long-sleeve shirts)
My friend's keep urging me to stop acting all emo lately. I haven't even noticed that, lol. I guess times come when i ask myself is it truly worth all this trouble to get one girl?
Back in october, i had a certain dream one night. It started with me walking down a road and followed by a girl who was supposedly my girlfriend. Just then, we were in a building and she broke up with me. Now, i never ever experienced true breakage of heart before (never had gf) but it was really deep and painful.
Flash forward to two days later (still in my dream, amazing how fast dreams go, lol), i'm walking toward the portable classes when my mind totally went bonkers an all i had in my mind was that face. The face of an amazing girl. A girl who would love moi not even for the looks. (sounding a bit gay, should stop know, lol)
So, all of a sudden, i flash forward somewhere in an elevator where we are staring face to face and i tell her everything i feel for her and ask her to go out. She smiles pleasantly, looks into my eyes (which i find beautiful) and says yes.
It was a feeling beyond anything. I was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO happy that night. (no wet dream, pervs )
So, i wake up, sad with fact that it was all a dream. I arrive to my fourth period class that day to open the door to my good friend, Jessica and when i glance into her eyes as she says thanks, i suddenly open my mouth in awe. Jessica was that girl.
Now, jessica is very Emo, she loves music and art and is punk rock. She is very quiet and shy and doesn't like to talk to many persons.
Over the following weeks, strange things start to happen. I try to find many attempts to get her to go out except for me actually asking her directly from the dream (i'm not that brave, lol. After many tries, including my friend hooking me up with her on a concert which she later decided not to go, i finally gave up on it.
But...my gut tightened up everytime at the sight of her. I couldn't keep my eyes of her. She was the most beautiful gilr ever and even if the hottest girl in school came up to me and asked me to be her bf, i would ABSOLUTELY say no. Many people refuse to belive that but it's true.
So January comes and she starts talking to me on myspace. we exchange messages every now and then on the site. Then come's what i like to call "the valentine's day disaster".
Valentine's day came and my best friend recomended me that since i now talked to jess on a daily basis, i should give her a present for that day. I went out and tried to get her a superman teddybear (she's obsessed with superman) but no hope in finding it.
I basically got a red teddy bear, a pot of flowers, a card, and chocolate and gave it to her....kinda.
I wanted to do it in a special way so i put it on her desk at the beginning of the period. She smiled and put it down. I went up to her and said "happy valentine's day jess". She smiled and just said "thanks, i like the flowers" and then TURNED her head, thus ending the conversation.
We didn't talk for a few more weeks. After a while, i realized that i tried to rush straight into a relationship. I realized that i first have to be a friend to her and sooner or later, we'll be very close as friends that something might happen.
I started again, for a third time, to try to work things out. It was my friend's 18th b-day and she wanted to celenrate it at disneyworld starting at animal kingdom and ending at magic kingdom. I soon found out Jess was going to be there.
So, i went to animal kingdom and caught up with my friends. The whole morning, me and jess didn't talk to each other at all. We rode separate on rides and we didn't look at each other. Then, came expedition everest, a new roller coaster ride that just opened. When my friend who invited me decided she was not going to risk going on the roller coaster, jessica joined in. that's when i decided that she shouldn't be missing the chance in a lifetime to ride this so i broke my silence and pressured her into going on it. I told her that it wasn't so bad and that i already rode it before (i didn't, i lied).
She finally decided to go and we rode together on the ride. It was awesome, we both screamed when that big drop came, and she hugged me the entire trip. When the ride ended, we broke our silence and talked for the rest of the day. We went on to magic kingdom where we went on every rde ther as pairs, laughing and screaming our lungs out. When the day ended, 3 days of moodiness began..
My mind just came to and thought to myself: What if nothing happens? she's a punk rock girl and i'm just and hispanic guy who had a weird dream about her. I can't imagine my life without her. My friend's say i'm trying too hard. I've never felt the same way for a girl like this. She's probably looking for the perfect punk rock guy in shining armor to pick her up and take her away.
She also dreams of her perfect man being....a...vegetarian.
I love meat, but after faking to her that i watch smallville (which i don't, sorry karn) and that i loved many of the punk rock bands she mentions, i seem to be trying too hard to get her.
....but my mind isn't clear.
I thought a lot from that day. It was the greatest day of my life, hanging out with the girl i love. I longed for more days like that but she acted as it never happened.
We talked more for about a month up until today as well. I figured it is best to know her better than ever before. So, i proposed a plan with my other friend to go see a movie called stay alive and make it a double date.
So, i prepared for the big night. Fianlly, a time to prove to this girl how you feel about her. We made up so that we would meet at a verizon store near the theater. I waited there and headed inside to play a bit of oblivion on 360 when i felt a hood blind my eyes, lol.
There they were, my friend, her date, and jessica dressed in a punk rock outfit that would make guys avoid her...but i didn't. I saw beyond that and saw the beauty which was truly her. We walked for a bit, quiet and then she broke the silence, asked about how i was, and soon, we talked the whole time. We saw the movie and sat together. We talked a lot while waiting for the movie. We shared some secrets and i told her my darkest fear (which i will not mention here, boo-hoo).
There was no kissing, no hugging, no armrest-touch-hand romance. We saw the movie and then we went to the CD store to look at CD's. Then it got worse. She asked me about some bands called matchbook romance, hawthorne heights, she wants revenge, amber lynn and many others. I lied that i knew them....
The date ended soon after that. She said good-bye and i tapped her shoulder, no kiss or hug.
Dunno what to do next. I only wish for things to work out for me and this girl. That's all i want. Without her in my life, it seems worthless....
Hey all. Well, you're about to hear my life so far in sunny and beautiful, winter garden, florida.
Soo, let's start with school. Here, the system is quite different so i'm still in high school in what's called my "junior year". The rankings include 9th grade=freshman, 10th grade=sophmore, 11th grade=junior, and 12th grade=senior.
After that is, well, university or college.
School here for me is from 7:20 AM to 2:10 PM.
So, let's get down to school. Geometry is very much my better class of the day. Not only is the teacher better than my sophmore teacher (was a HUGE bitch) but i understand the term better.
Spanish 3 is the easiest class of the day since, well, i'm hispanic!!! The main reason i'm taking it is so that i have the necessary requirements for college (2 years of a language).
English 3 is pretty much average with the same shit as always. Reading stories and this weird teacher finding and making some horribel jokes.
Now comes marine biology, possibly my worst class of the day. The teahcer does not explain shit at all and doesn't even care if we fail the fucking class. All she does is give us instructions with our labs and when we ask her for help, she justs responds with a simple: "Read the instructions".
BSA (business software appliance) is my favorite class of the day. We train with microsft word, excel and powerpoint in making graphs as well as earns from the fund-raisers we make. Every month, there is a mandatory business suit daywhere we have to put on businees clothes complete with a tie, shoes, and gelled hair.
U.S history is basically studying the past of the U.S and how the constitution was made and the declaration of independence. I really thought i would be bad at that class due to my lack of remebering the things that i study but thankfully, i'm getting an A in that class.
The grades are as follows:
On the relationship side, nothing yet. Still wearing glasses as usual only now with thick lenses. I wish i had contacts.
The girls here in florida are only interested in one thing and that's muscles, a great body, and cute faces.
Unfortunately, poor old fernando is neither of them. But, meh, i stil have until may of next year to finish up so we'll see what happens. There is a lot of girls i'm interested in but i fail to even see me starting a relationship with them.
Family. My sister (twilight-princess) is alright. She's finally getting into her first year of high school and flirting around with boys as any girl would. Father is alright except for teh occasional bills every month and hand problems. My Caring mother still cooking and cleaning around the house. With me helping her, of course! Non-family. My uncles, aunts and cousins are all hispanic and seriously, i don't relate to them at all. Sure, they say at times that i give the word hispanic a bad anme and that at times, i'm acting white instead of hispanic.What can i say? I love other things and consider myself at times american. I speak more english than spanish so i guess i just love opposite things. Animals. My hamster Kiwi has gone fat a bit but still loves running in his wheel and waiting for his owner to give him food. All in all, my family and myself are living life good and with our trip to new jersey soon, i hope it gets better.
Friends. Not many. A lot of them are still in new jersey, which i miss, but either way, i'll meet up with them pretty soon when i move outta this place. Back to new jersey where snow falls and the air smelles of gang violence and robberies. Going back in december for my cousin's 15th birthday. Planning on meeting my friends and inviting them to a lobster dinner and talk about what i've missed over almost a year. I can't wait!!!
Getting bored? Don't worry, i'm almost done here.
Hmm, thing's i'm looking forward. well, zelda's been officially delayed until after march 31st so that's outta my list. STAR WARS EPISODE 3!!! My favorite blcokbuster of may is finally getting on DVD on november 1. Halloween horror nights, an all-october festivitie celebrated at universal studios is already in session and hopefully, i can go this year with my......uh.. cousins?
Meh, all in all life's pretty good in florida. Sure, i miss new jersey at times but what can i do? God has given me the gift of a perfect family and a home and a good hobby of gaming!
Cubed3 is backand better than ever. Kudos to JB for giving me an actual reason to be online, lol. Still on MSN, talking to Blade, hazukisan, fenno, and TAG. The other guys, well, i'llhave to get back to you on that.
So here's the end of my blog. Hope you enjoyed it. Remember, live life to the fullest,take chances, and god bless.
Still on the intr
-Fernando "jesus" Murrugarra AKA linkman26 on cubed 3 AKA jesus on msn.