Lame Jokes
Off Topic

Q: What did the fish say when it hit a wall?
A: Dam.

Get it?!

Anyway, I thought this would be a nice place to add some fun, randomness and generally crap lulz in. Post your lame jokes!

( Edited 27.04.2008 15:19 by SuperLink )

Hahahahaha that is definitely crap. The joke was so lame.

Hehe, I'll offer my slightly nerdy joke.

Two mathematicians are having a conversation:
"What do you get if you integrate 1/cabin?"
"Erm...a natural log cabin?"
"No, a houseboat. The forgot the C!"

LOL!

This is also another funny mathematic joke:
"What did pi say to i?"
"Get real"

"What did i say to pi?"
"Be rational"

...

"What do you get, when you cross an owl, with a bungee chord?
My ass."

I heard that on the internet somewhere. I don't know if it's meant to be funny or not.

"What do you call a smashed & emptied Piggy Bank?
Broke"

I made that last one myself when I was about 10 I think.

That's from Kung Pow: Enter the Fist

why do mathmeticians never need to sunbathe? because they multiply sin by cos and get tan! (i think)

two guys walk into a bar...oww

a mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says he dosent want hime there, the shroom replies why not? im a funguy!

why cant you live in funghi?? because there is not mushroom!

whats worse than 10 dead babies ina barrel?1 baby in 10 barrels!

how do you get a baby in a jar? blender, how do you get it out of the jar??....doritos!

what is pink and goes red at the touch of a button?..baby in a blender!

what is green and goes red at the touch of a button? last weeks dead baby in a blender!

(you can tell my free periods are spent well with freinds XD) [they are jokes dont take them seriously im not a sick person i have a baby brother]

Ah, now I finally know what it's from. Does it actually mean anything?

I saw it on an Advent Children video called "Cloud's Dream" If you haven't seen it already you need to

Babies + Blenders = Funny jokes

knock knock
whos there
boo
boo who
thats it cry u wimp, id stick that bat up ur ass and turn u into a popsickle

How do you get a Pikachu on a bus?
Push them onto the bus with your hands!

Wait... that's not right...

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
It's The Doctor.
Doctor Who?
Exactly.

Why are pirates called pirates?

whats brown and sticky?
A stick

lolz

whats white and sticky???

A physics professor and his assistant are working on liberating negatively charged hydroxyl ions, when all of a sudden, the assistant says,

"Wait, Professor! What if the salicylic acids do not accept the hydroxyl ions?"

And the professor responds, "That's no hydroxyl ion! That's my wife!"

To be or not to be.
-- Shakespeare
To do is to be.
-- Nietzsche
To be is to do.
-- Sartre
Do be do be do.
-- Sinatra

clara is a scientist but now she is no more, because what she thought was H2O was H2SO4!

What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?

How do you make a hormone?

LOL

DEXTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Never knew anyone\'d get it! O_O

\"What do you call Batman and Robin after they\'ve been run over by a steamroller?\"

\"Flatman and Ribbon\"

( Edited 23.04.2008 03:06 by PK Mongoose )

Keep them coming guys!

Q: What did Batman say to Robin when they got to the car?
A: Robin, get in the car.

tan=sin/cos, but close enough!

There\'s an Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman, and they come across a magic fairy. \"I will give you a wish each\" says the fairy, \"but you must use your wish to protect the country that you\'re from, not for your own gain\".

The Irishman says he wants Ireland to have the greatest navy in the world to protect from overseas attack, and so it is done. The Englishman decides to surround England with a wall that no-one could ever get through, to protect England from attack altogether.

The Scotsman asks the fairy \"can you tell me more about this wall?\" \"Of course. The wall is 4m high, 1m thick, goes around the whole of England and nothing can get in or out\".

\"In that case\" says the Scotsman \"Can you fill England with water?\"

---

Did you hear about the magic tractor?
It turned into a field!

( Edited 23.04.2008 10:42 by Smells like cheese )

Do. :/

( Edited 23.04.2008 10:42 by Bart.... )

What's E.T. short for?

Because he's got little legs.

Also, I want you all to read this: Joke (try to ignore the dumb ads)

No cheating and skipping to the end, read the whole thing. It'll definitely be the most worthwhile thing you've ever done...

I remember that longest joke in the world. It cropped up on C3 a couple of years ago. I thought that the story was actually more interesting then the joke!

( Edited 23.04.2008 17:06 by Smells like cheese )