Guns

Note: Just thought of this as I was about to press "Submit". This thread is not about America's gun laws. Maybe you live in America and they affect you, so I'll allow it, but that's not why I'm here. Jus' sayin'.

I've been getting a little bit worried about my nephew, lately. It started a couple months back when we went to a steam rally in Redbourn. There were some BB guns there that looked like replicas. Anyway, he saw them and got super-hyped and was begging me and my dad for money to buy one. We both obviously refused. This is nothing as a one-off thing, and I'd shrug it off if it was just that.

In the time since he's developed a sort of obsession with guns. Now I know most little boys think guns are cool - me and my mates did - but we were never obsessed by them. In 'play time', a laser gun was always seen as extremely preferential to a real life gun, haha. So anyway, my nephew has developed an interest in real guns and the military and stuff, and his reactions to violence in films and stuff is worrying.

He's ten years old, and I've seen him playing COD and going round shooting all the dead bodies and blowing them up I know what you're all going to say - "He shouldn't be playing those games and watching those films at his age", and you're right - he shouldn't. I'm not his mum, though, and since me and her always watched really adult films when we were little, she thinks nothing of it.

I see something in him that I don't recognise in myself or anyone else from my childhood, and it worries me. I think he thinks guns and war and stuff is some sort of game or something. As if he doesn't realise that they're weapons, almost. He does of course, but it's like he more closely associates guns with "games and films" than he does with "war". I think to him "war" is just something he's seen on the telly. He doesn't seem to understand the abject misery they carry in real life. He likes them.

The first thing I think about whenever I see a gun is "violence, war, gangs, etc". I think the first thing that crosses his mind are games and films.

Am I worrying about nothing?

First of all, how long has this obessesion been carrying on and second, do any of his freinds encourage him/are similar?

There is a high chance that it is just a phase that he is going through and possibly due to his age he doesn't understand/realise the implications that war and guns have on the world. At the age of 10 it can seem all a game to him, real life implications haven't really struck him and things like war (the nitty gritty parts) arn't really taught in schools untill a later date.

However, if it continues to his early teens (or you could start now even with your family) begin to teach him what happens in war, the devistation it causes and possibly, stop him playing overly violent games (COD included I suppose) as there is a reason for age ratings as kids cannot fully comprehend the actions on screen and apply it to real world scenarios instead. It's part of growing up, seperating fantasy from reality (good example would be Briony from the book Atonement by Ian McEwan) and untill they can learn to do that then they will see things like games and think it's real life.

Either that, or the kid might join the army or something when he's older if it's something that he has a passion about. Everyone has different loves and hates in their lives.

Also, don't buy him any guns (BB etc) untill he actually knows the proper implications of what happens and untill he is much, much more mature. He might just be going through the gun phase later than everyone esle.

Or he could be a phsycho! Smilie

No but seriously, kids have phases of different things, I had obsessions with electrics, beyblades, making things, yo yo's etc. Its what he enjoys.

BUMP: I also find it amazing sometimes how threads like this can be ignored when the majority of the people on this thread are in their teens and could easily offer help on this matter *Glares at the rest of the forum* I aint letting this die untill someone else offers their opinion to help Martin_.

Mods..?

One day I'll be a mod. Stupid why would we want to watch Torchwood or queer as folk? fuck off bitch.

On topic, has any of you tried to ask him what a gun means to him. Ask him whether he thinks it's right to kill. How he would feel if he held a gun or if he killed someone. Try to get an emotional response.

Maybe. I think I'd just get a stupid response, though. The other day he made some joke about nuclear bombs, and if it was a grown person, I wouldn't have had an issue because a grown person is in a position to make an offensive joke work. He's only 10 though, and doesn't even know what a nuclear bomb is. I tried to tell him that the Americans killed 220,000 Japanese civilians with two nuclear bombs in 1945. He seemed nonplussed at the information. I dunno, maybe I'm just expecting too much maturity from him, and he just gets all this stuff from all the really violent films and games.

As for the mods, you guys are fucking useless. About as quick as a dead turtle to sort things out. A few of the mods don't even come here that much any more?

Martin_ said:
As for the mods, you guys are fucking useless. About as quick as a dead turtle to sort things out. A few of the mods don\'t even come here that much any more?

But my anti-virus is out so I\'m not gonna be on the net for a few days starting tomorrow. However will you guys cope without me?

( Edited 21.09.2009 16:20 by SuperLink )

Meh, he's 10. Kids are idiots, hopefully he'll just grow out of it. I'd keep criticising him for it though, he won't grow out of it if you don't drill into him how bad it is.

SuperLink said:

Martin_ said:
As for the mods, you guys are fucking useless. About as quick as a dead turtle to sort things out. A few of the mods don't even come here that much any more?

I sorted it out first thing when I got on thismorning

But my anti-virus is out so I'm not gonna be on the net for a few days starting tomorrow. However will you guys cope without me?

Mate, you're the most visible active mod, with Jacob close behind you. I swear there's a few others who never come here any more except occasionally to lurk. The site needs active mods. Just sayin'.

Woah 10 and he knows what a nuclear bomb. When I was shown the A-Bomb effects I had nightmares lol.

Well nah that's what I said, he doesn't know what a nuclear bomb is, he's just heard the phrase somewhere.

As for the mods, you guys are fucking useless. About as quick as a dead turtle to sort things out. A few of the mods don't even come here that much any more?

Where was the Mod Alert? We can't sense problems. We are thinking of adding some more mods though; there are only a few of us who can really keep an eye on the place right now.

As for your nephew, I wouldn't worry too much. Its very common for kids -- boys especially -- to see weapons and warfare as extraordinarily cool stuff without realizing the impact. To him people dying is just like his video games, no big deal. Mow 'em down and get bonus points.

Most kids eventually grow up and realize that war is a real thing and that real people get affected. Some kids take longer than others.

Jacob4000 said:
Where was the Mod Alert? We can\'t sense problems.

That\'s true, I didn\'t do a Mod Alert. I forgot all about that button, to be honest with you. It was better when the Mod Alert thing was on each post. Anyway, the site could probably use one or two more active mods. People that are on the forums a lot are in a much better position to sort things out. You and SuperLink hold the fort pretty well, but you (and all of us) could do with more mods that are around at least as much as you two are.

( Edited 21.09.2009 19:32 by Martin_ )

If it is a phase and you dont think hes growing out of it you could use tactics that seem like your encouraging him when your doing the opposite. Show him pictures of people who were shot .. scare the shit out of him basically and make him realise actions have consequences.

On the otherhand you could just try really hard to get him into something, everybody mentions sport but thats just crap as nowadays kids dont wanna do that they're all lazy cunts. Take him to the pub with you? have a game of pool .. teach him how to cook things .. I couldn't tell ya, im only 21 so most of the things id mention a 10yr old probably couldn't care less about. Gardening maybe?

Thanks, but 1) Though I've thought of maybe showing him some real pictures etc of death and war, it's just as likely to give him nightmares for six months as teach him anything. I don't want to fuck him up. 2) It's not my place to 'correct' another person's child, even if he is my nephew. I know I was asking for advice, but I'd just be passing any good stuff on to my sister.

Show him pictures of people who were shot .. scare the shit out of him basically and make him realise actions have consequences.

Terrible idea.

But honestly, i'd say its just a phase. I'd personally just make sure to keep it in check, he'll probably just grow out of it.

You could always force him into watching those "Murder Investigation Shows" based off real cases, just to check his reactions.

Personally, I think his problem is that he\'s got no friends. He\'s like this little video game nerd that has no other interests other than games and guns and stuff. All he cares about is computer games. He\'s going to secondary school next year, so I suppose he\'ll have to make some friends because that\'s where all the proper social stuff starts happening.

Or he might just push the \'video game nerd\' thing to it\'s ultimate extreme and be the subject of intense bullying for the first few years and regress even further into himself, and then finally use his knowledge of weaponry to go into school and murder everyone with an automatic machine gun..

( Edited 22.09.2009 01:42 by Martin_ )

Martin_ said:
Personally, I think his problem is that he's got no friends. He's like this little video game nerd that has no other interests other than games and guns and stuff.

Martin_ said:
Personally, I think his problem is that he\'s got no friends. He\'s like this little video game nerd that has no other interests other than games and guns and stuff. All he cares about is computer games. He\'s going to secondary school next year, so I suppose he\'ll have to make some friends because that\'s where all the proper social stuff starts happening.

Or he might just push the \'video game nerd\' thing to it\'s ultimate extreme and be the subject of intense bullying for the first few years and regress even further into himself, and then finally use his knowledge of weaponry to go into school and murder everyone with an automatic machine gun..

Meh. I was a gamer through my secondary school years, and generally just made friends with other gamers. If anything i could see secondary school helping him grow out of it more than anything else.

Ever thought about teaching him guitar though? I know you\'re a guitarist, and playing an instrument can help make friends, or at least give him something other than games or guns ya know? Ofcourse, thats if he wants too. On the note of games though, i played the Original quake, (And all said subsequent sequels) and the usual gory fps, and it didn\'t do much to me. But i guess it depends on the kid, and the parents. I always had no problem realising guns = bad

( Edited 22.09.2009 02:05 by TaoFire )

Games now are far in advance of Quake. A lot of what went on in Quake you had to sort of use your imagination quite a bit because the graphics sucked balls. It's not like that now. Good shout on the 'teaching him something', though. He's not really into music, but it's still an idea. Could be anything, doesn't have to be guitar lessons. I'll mention it to his mum

I too was like this at one point in my life, maybe not obsessed, but I did like me some violence. I think what did it for me is when I went on a quail hunt and got a rifle on my next birthday. Holding the gun in your hand, everything becomes real, and you realize that what you're holding can actually kill someone, and for awhile, that freaks you out.

Maybe the answer is to take him to a shooting range and let him take a couple of shots in a safe, controlled enviroment. That did it for me, at least...

Captian said:

Martin_ said:
Personally, I think his problem is that he's got no friends. He's like this little video game nerd that has no other interests other than games and guns and stuff.

Woah....o_0 My cousin!?!?!?
sounds like it

Prince was your cousin? I fucking knew it.